It started with mold.

One of those unglamorous, deeply inconvenient life moments that flips your plans upside down. Our home wasn’t safe to stay in anymore, and we needed to move out—fast.

In that sudden swirl of decisions and logistics, a dear friend opened her doors to us. No hesitation. No conditions. Just love in action.

And even as I said yes with my mouth, some part of me said no with my energy.

The Guilt That Snuck In

At first, I brushed it off. I was grateful. Truly. But a few days in, I noticed something:

I was walking on eggshells. Not because she made me feel unwelcome. Quite the opposite. But because I had built an inner narrative that whispered:

"You're staying too long. You're in the way. She's just being polite. Don't inconvenience her. Don't need too much."

Familiar lines. Old programming. And suddenly, I wasn't just navigating a moldy house. I was navigating the mold in my own mind—the places where guilt and shame had quietly settled in over the years.

Shame Disguised as Sensitivity

What I thought was being "considerate" was actually a low hum of self-rejection. I was trying so hard not to be a burden that I was shrinking my energy in her home.

Instead of settling in, I hovered. Instead of receiving, I evaluated.

I became hyper-attuned to her moods, her body language, the tone of her voice. Not to connect—but to protect. To preempt.

It was me, not her, creating the tension.

And that was the moment something shifted.

A New Thought Arrived

What if she actually loves me?

Not tolerates. Not obliges. Loves.

What if this act of generosity wasn't some obligation she quietly resents, but a genuine offering from her heart?

What if… this is life loving me through her?

Energy Doesn’t Lie

The energy I was putting out—tense, small, overly cautious—was creating exactly what I didn’t want: disconnection. Discomfort. Misattunement.

When I shifted into gratitude, I felt my body soften. My breath returned. My shoulders dropped.

Instead of tiptoeing through her home, I walked with reverence. Instead of apologizing for needing space, I honored her gift by fully receiving it.

Because here's the truth I keep relearning:

The energy you hold becomes the experience you create.

How I Recentered (A Quiet Practice)

I began doing a small ritual each morning before stepping out of our guest room:

• I placed both feet on the ground and whispered, "Thank you for this sanctuary." • I touched my heart and said, "I am safe to receive." • And if the guilt rose again (and it did), I let it pass like a wave.

I reminded myself: Someone who loves me offered this space freely. My gratitude is the only return that matters.

If You're Feeling Like a Burden Too…

I want to offer you this:

You are not too much. You are not overstaying your welcome. You are not broken because you needed help.

Sometimes, life cares for us through other people. Sometimes, the very thing that makes us want to shrink—our neediness, our timing, our temporary unraveling—is the invitation to receive love more deeply.

Not with guilt. But with grace.

Reframe the Reaction

Guilt and shame will tell you to withdraw. Gratitude will tell you to open.

So when you feel yourself spiraling—into apology, into performance, into invisibility—pause. Breathe. Ask:

What if this is life taking care of me?

Because most of the time, it is.

And your only job is to receive it with a soft heart and a steady thank you.

You deserve that much. We all do.